The Beginning

Baby at a few weeks old, picture taken by myself.

Just over 2 years old I began my breast feeding journey, which a few months in I considered writing about my experience but found time flying by. My thought was that if my experience helps even just one other person in a similar situation then it was worth writing about. My decision to breast feed was made early on within the pregnancy, with my partner very much on board with the decision as well. This is my second child and with bottle feeding my first, with lack of support or knowledge around breast feeding (a good 10 years ago) I felt I had to give it a chance with no regrets. This brings me to the small introduction into where my breast feeding journey begins!

With a planned home birth underway, the baby had decided to flip back to back to make it just that little bit more difficult and painful throughout the day. I had opted to give birth at home as I am not the biggest fan of hospitals and find it easier to relax and concentrate at home. To start with the pain was manageable and you consider for a few hours that it may just another false start and that the pain will just disappear, however starting at 11pm, until about 4am, the pain increased and in the back of my head, though still in denial I knew today was the day. My partner worked nights and I was keeping him posted with updates and said there was no point him rushing home until the pain intensified. Jumping ahead to the more interesting parts, hours had passed, partner was home and the pain had got extremely – well painful! I had found myself back at my original position, knees on the floor and leaning on the sofa, and as the baby was crowning and actually making an appearance to the world, there was a strange popping noise. In that moment I was terrified that I had ruptured something, but for a few minutes everything was forgotten as the baby was passed through my legs and placed in my arms – nothing else mattered.

Moments after baby was born and passed to myself. That one moment where nothing else matters.

Sadly reality had to come back to the world, which highlighted the pain I was still in, especially within my back. With the baby was taken by one of the midwives for checks and given to dad, I was ushered onto the sofa to check the damage! This is when I realised how painful my lower back was, and I struggled to sit down, with it sending sharp pains in and around my lower back, which I mentioned to the midwives, however the did not seem concerned. I left them to do their job with checking me over and sorting stitches when half way through the other midwife approached, with a little bundle, now dressed, making snuffling and grunting noises. My baby was the placed onto me, with the midwife getting the baby latched onto me before I had time to even register everything that had gone on that day and to that moment. Within that moment and before I knew it, this is where my breast feeding journey began!

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